2. You see a lot of smart guys with dumb women, but you 
hardly ever see a smart woman with dumb guys. 
-Erica Jong- 

3. I want to have children, but my friends scare me.  One of 
my friends told me she was in labor for 36 hours.  I don't even want 
to do anything that feels good for 36 hours. 
-Rita Rudner- 

4. I've been on so many blind dates, I should get a free dog. 
-Wendy Liebman- 

5. Never lend your car to anyone to whom you gave birth. 
-Erma Bombeck- 

6. If high heels were so wonderful, men would still be 
wearing them. 
-Sue Grafton- 

7. I'm not going to vacuum 'til Sears makes one you can ride on. 
-Roseanne Barr- 

8. I think - therefore I'm single. 
-Lizz Winstead- 

9. When women are depressed they either eat or go shopping. 
Men  invade another country. 
-Elayne Boosler- 

10. Behind every successful man is a surprised woman. 
-Maryon Pearson- 

11. I base most of my fashion taste on what doesn't itch. 
-Gilda Radner- 

12. In politics, if you want anything said, ask a man;  if 
you want something done, ask a woman. 
-Margaret Thacher- 

13. I have yet to hear a man ask for advice on how to 
combine marriage and a career. 
-Gloria Steinhem- 

14. I never married because there was no need.  I have three 
pets at home which answer the same purpose as a husband.  I have 
a dog which growls every morning, a parrot which swears all 
afternoon and a cat that comes home late at night. 
-Marie Corelli- 

15. Nagging is the repetition of unpalatable truths. 
-Baroness Edith Summerskill- 

16. If men can run the world, why can't they stop wearing 
neckties?    How intelligent is it to start the day by tying 
a noose around your neck? 
-Linda Ellerbee- 

17. I am a marvelous housekeeper.  Every time I leave a man, 
I keep the house. 
-Zsa Zsa Gabor- 

18. Send this to five bright women you know and make their day.